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THE SEARCH TO BELONG: Rethinking Intimacy, Community, and Small Groups - by Joseph R. Myers
...The cultural trend to seek out front porch is evident in the phenomenon of "church shopping." For several years, we have credited consumerism with birthing the trend for people to "shop" for a church that offers a buffet of choices to meet their many needs. We have observed that many individuals jumping denominational lines. We attributed these evils to the consumer mentality of our time. Yet I am not convinced that this is at the heart of people's search.

There may be several fundamental life searches, but the search to consume is not among them. People consume in an effort to fulfill a search. For example, a person may purchase a new outfit to help with their search for identity and individuality. At the same time another may make the same purchase to quench a desire to fit in, which helps with their search to belong. People do not consume just to consume.

What I believe may be happening is that people are dating our congregations. They are looking for communities where they can become part of the family. You do not shop for family. You date to find family. ...