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The Search to Belong: Rethinking Intimacy, Community, and Small Groups
by Joseph R. Myers

It is simply not true that people who belong only in public space are "on
the fringe." Nor is it true that we somehow need to get them to move
"closer" to get them to be committed."
Were we to validate that space people inhabit--whichever of the four spaces
it may be--we will find countless people who are actively committed into the
shadows or written off entirely.
Public spatial belonging is not about anonymity. And anonymity has little to
do with commitment. People can--and do--experience connectedness at
different levels, and when they feel connected, they explore the
possibilities of significant, committed participation.
Consider Jesus' encounter with the soldier, a centurion in the Roman army of
occupation.
When Jesus had entered Capernaum, a centurion came to him, asking for
help. "Lord," he said, "my servant lies at home paralysed and in terrible
suffering."
Jesus said to him, "I will go and heal him."
The centurion replied, "Lord, I do not deserve to have you come under my
roof. But just say the word, and my servant will be healed. For I myself am
a man under authority, with soldiers under me. I tell this one, 'Go,' and he
goes; and that one, 'Come,' and he comes. I say to my servant, 'Do this,'
and he does it."
When Jesus heard this, he was astonished and said to those following him,
"I tell you the truth, I have not found anyone in Israel with such great
faith. I say to you that many will come from the east and the west, and will
take their places at the feast with Abraham, Isaac and Jacob in the kingdom
of heaven. But the subjects of the kingdom will be thrown outside, into the
darkness, where there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth."
Then Jesus said to the centurion, "Go! It will be done just as you
believed it would." And his servant was healed at that very hour.

Jesus is a master of permitting people to belong to him in all four spaces.
He offered to come to the centurion's home. Why didn't the centurion want
Jesus to come? He had his reasons. Matthew says he felt he did not deserve
it. Luke says the centurion did not consider himself worthy.
Whatever the reason, Jesus accepted the centurion's statement; he did not
insist on coming closer. He allowed this centurion to be a part of the
"family" in public space. The centurion did not want to be intimate with
Jesus. The centurion was not after a personal or a social relationship. He
needed Jesus to accept him in a public space and yet help in a significant
way. Jesus honoured that request.
True community can be experienced in a public space. Public space is not
mere togetherness:, it is connectedness. It is family. An essential key to
developing community is the maturing of our competencies to growing
significant, committed public belongings.
What would this look like in our congregations? Can we be comfortable with
people belonging to Jesus and the church in public space? Can we give the
help, home, and home in the space where they choose to belong? Without
pushing them to come closer? - (p. 43-44)

Many belonged to Jesus in different spaces. The Bible mentions the
multitudes, a room full, a crowd of seventy, twelve apostles, the inner
circle of Peter, James, and John. All experienced community with Jesus.
What would this look like in our congregations and communities? Are we
comfortable with people belonging to Jesus and the church in public or
social space? Can we give them significant connections in whatever space
they chose to belong without pushing them to come closer?
Jesus never forced strangers to become intimate. Instead he encouraged them
to move from stranger to public belonger. "I was a stranger and you invited
me in," does not imply intimate. The stranger is invited in, to belong
publicly (p. 112)